BLOOMIE AT THE ALTAR

Remember how the mayor reveled in bringing the big-haired Christian-right armies to town for the Republican National Convention? It was supposed to be a shot in the arm for local business and a good old time for everyone. But the entire city went on edge as Bloomberg risked riots by refusing to give antiwar protestors a permit for Central Park, then locked hundreds of people up for more than 24 hours, violating civil liberties like his thuggish guests from the Bush administration.

Now Bloomberg is telling us that marriage equality for gays would bring "chaos." In fact, if New York became a mecca for queer nuptials, it would bring big money, as the global gay elite filled up our hotels and restaurants. (Unlike the trash that came for the RNC. Burdened by security costs, the event was a complete bust despite Bloomberg's promises.)

But Bloomberg needs to find a reason to oppose marriage for gays, while still defining himself as "pro-gay," if only to beat back a primary challenge in his own party. So fear of "chaos" it is. For Bloomberg to now claim that he's in favor of gay marriage rights-after years of refusing to weigh in on the issue-is gallingly transparent, particularly since he claimed last weekend that he backs marriage equality in the same breath in which he announced his intent to appeal State Supreme Court Justice Doris Ling-Cohan's Friday ruling ordering the city to allow gays to marry.

The decision was made just a day before Bloomberg was to appear before the annual dinner of the Human Rights Campaign (the nation's largest gay rights group) at the Waldorf. Ling-Cohan's decision-stayed for 30 days, allowing the city time to appeal to the state's highest court, the Court of Appeals-was a delicious hot potato thrown Bloomberg's way, as it forced him to come out of the closet as a politician indifferent to gay rights who will even court the nasty crowd if need be. Having already refused to sign two pro-gay bills last year, Bloomberg was trying to mend fences with a voting bloc he'll need in his reelection bid. The accomodationist HRC was only too willing to collaborate, inviting him to speak at its annual dinner, where he could woo the gay glitterati.

But then came the ruling, followed by swift announcements from Democratic hopefuls Fernando Ferrer and Gifford Miller that the decision should not be appealed. Bloomberg told the crowd at the Waldorf and another gay group in Queens later that night that he would appeal the decision because, in addition to the "chaos" that might ensue if homosexuals flocked here to marry, he wants an answer "once and for all" so that the issue can be settled with finality. He even said he would fight for gay marriage in the state legislature if the court upholds a marriage ban.

Bloomberg was nontheless booed at both events, illustrating that his standing with gays-and perhaps his reelection-is in jeopardy. As Alan Van Capelle, director of the Empire State Pride Agenda, told the New York Times: "When gay and lesbian New Yorkers realize the only thing stopping them from getting marriage licenses was Bloomberg they're going to have to make a decision about how angry they are with this mayor." Let's hope they rage right into the voting booth.

-Michelangelo Signorile