BLOTTER with Detector Hortensia Destousche

One thing about big ol' snowstorms-they tend to dramatically cut down on street crime. Who the hell wants to mug someone during a blizzard? If you do, then you have to spend all that time digging through layers of coats, sweaters and scarves looking for the damned wallet. It's just a pain in the ass.

But while it may cut down muggings dramatically, it doesn't get rid of them. Take the case of the four youths who, like so many other people, went out to Central Park Sunday to make the most of the winter wonderland before the snow turned all black and crappy. Trouble was, the snow was just too fluffy for decent snowballs, snow forts or snowmen. That must've been very frustrating.

That's when they saw 61 year-old Chuangang Zhao, who was also in the park shortly after noon, taking pictures of the snow. After all-with global warming and everything, who knows when we'll ever see snow again?

Anyway, the four youths, aggravated by the unpacky snow, allegedly unleashed their frustration upon unlucky Zhao, socking him in the head, knocking him down and snatching his fancy digital camera.

Zhang will be fine, walking away with only a few scrapes and bruises. Unfortunately he was unable to provide police with any sort of usable description of the youths. It was snowing, after all.

Justifiable Menacing

Last Thursday, a landlord and super were doing some repairs in an apartment building in Kensington, and were apparently making one godawful racket. We've all been there, haven't we? Well the noise just about drove Isabel Wittingham, a resident of the building, nuts. Or maybe it really did, who knows? In any case, she knew she had to put a stop to it somehow, so she did the only thing that made sense-she allegedly grabbed a knife, went out into the hallway and told the two of them to shut the hell up with all the clanging and banging.

Well, she might've been fine if it weren't for the whole "waving the knife around" thing. She's now being charged with menacing, weapons possession and attempted assault.

The DOT-Still Working for You!

His neighbors on Staten Island described 45 year-old Glenn Kittel as "a hunter and a weirdo." Funny thing is, a lot of people describe the Vice President in exactly the same terms. Maybe that helps explain what happened last Wednesday. A little after one that afternoon, Kittel-who installs road signs for the city's Department of Transportation-slammed his van into a tree near his home. When police arrived to pull him from beneath the crushed dashboard, they found he was carrying a metal sign which read "Hang Cheney." They also found some cocaine and prescription drugs. And they found 11 guns, 40 knives, a samurai sword-and a piñata.

It's unclear where Kittel was heading, or what he intending to do with all of it. Most puzzling and ominous of all-how did the piñata work into his (apparently) nefarious scheme? It was shaped like a mule, it was reported, or perhaps a chubby horse.

At present Kittel is being charged with DUI and misdemeanor weapons charges.