ED-gilderman36 WHERE ARE you from originally? Des Moines, Iowa. And what brought ...

WHERE ARE you from originally? Des Moines, Iowa.

And what brought you to New York? I'm a dancer and a singer.

Really? Yeah. Modern and ballet.

And may I ask if- [Laughing] I'm straight.

Which means you've probably dated all these beautiful ballerinas. Yeah, college was pretty interesting... They understand what I'm going through. Like if I'm sore or something.

They'll massage you. Exactly. They understand the rigors of dancing. It's a lot of hard work but a lot of fun. You get to know them on a very personal level, not sexually speaking.

Occasionally sexually. Hopefully. You're always partnering, and you learn to read someone, how if they're in a bad mood, it's going to affect that day.

Please tell our degenerate male readers how they, too, can meet a ballerina. Most are really attainable. They're very free and open? I would start attending dance. Especially downtown, the modern dance scene. It's cheap, like five or 10 bucks. And the audience is going to be nothing but beautiful young ladies who are either dancers or who are interested in dance.

Does it ever bug you how tights show off your balls? I think you get over it. But it's always a concern, sure. There's always lamb's wool if you want to stuff it.

Really. We did that as a joke on a cruise ship. We put some lamb's wool in our tights. We had some older ladies checking us out like, "Oh my word!" It was funny.

Nice. But you get used to it. Dance belts always keep things nice and tight and give you a good representation, if you will.

So would you say that the medium of dance attracts men with outsized genitals? I doubt that. They're definitely more comfortable with their bodies. But that comes with dance. Maybe you're not born with it, but through dance you learn to accept your body and the way you move. That extends way beyond dance. It extends into all aspects of your life.

So you've never had a day where you felt your genitals were too small to perform? [Laughing] Maybe if it was particularly cold and they were all hiked up?

Let's talk about the Cedar Tavern. Okay.

A lot of famous writers come here. But what about all the crappy writers? There's probably 40 of them in there right now, for Christ's sake? But it's an interesting place. There's a lot of philosophizing going on. This is the only job I've had in New York, besides dance gigs and the band that I'm in. I got this job the day after I moved here. I've been here about five years.

It's my favorite bar-restaurant in the city. I love it. We can be a little short sometimes, but we try not to do it to our regulars. Some people don't know the situation, that we want to save the space for people who come back day after day, not just for some tourist who wants to have one beer.

New York Press readers dig this place. They're always welcome. o