Pride and Paranoia

In connection with the 10th anniversary of the bombing of the Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City, I've managed to obtain an exclusive prison interview with Terry Nichols.

What are your thoughts today about that horrific act of domestic terrorism in which you participated? Oh, I'd say, the irony of how we got caught.

What do you mean? Well, think about the odds. Timothy McVeigh was against the United States government. He didn't want to have anything to do with this government. He didn't even want to have a driver's license. He didn't want to have a license plate on his car. But the reason he got caught was because some traffic cop happened to notice that the license plate was missing from his car.

And what about you? Well, just like Tim, I hated the federal government. I refused to pay taxes. And yet the reason I got caught was because they found a six-month-old receipt for a couple of tons of fertilizer. I can't explain rationally why I ever saved that receipt. I mean I wasn't gonna pay my taxes. And what would I do if the bombing failed? Go back to the store where I bought it, show my receipt and say, "I'm sorry, but your fertilizer didn't work. I'd like to get a refund, please?"

I understand that you believe there was a certain relationship between the bombing and the O.J. Simpson murders. Yes, there was some guy, it was his job, his mission in life, to determine that the disembodied leg which was found in the rubble of the Federal Building did not belong to a white man but to a black woman, and furthermore, just like the glove that was planted in the Simpson case, that leg was planted in the rubble by Detective Mark Furhman.

Aha! But whatever the defense, the prosecution and the judge did in that trial, there was also the media fallout. I have a friend who has two young daughters, and they said to him, "Daddy, we have a question to ask you. If you ever killed Mommy-and we're not saying you would ever do a thing like that-but if you ever killed Mommy and we asked you if you did it, would you tell us the truth?" You know, if a character on a tv sitcom ever said that line, there would be a laugh track right after it.

I suppose so. One more question. I understand that you also believe that there was a certain relationship between the Oklahoma bombing and the murder of Laci Peterson and her unborn baby. Oh, definitely. This never came out in my trial, but it was Scott Peterson who sold me those two tons of fertilizer.