WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 1 NEW RESIDENT VIDEOS AT MOMA In 1980, realizing that ...
b>DECEMBER 1
NEW RESIDENT VIDEOS AT MOMA
In 1980, realizing that minute-long commercial jingles were the true folk music of America, the Residents conceived The Commercial Album, a collection of 40 songs, each one minute in length. They also made four alien and unsettling 60-second films to accompany the album. The One Minute Movies were immediately recognized by MoMA as groundbreaking examples of what would later be known as "music video," and became part of the museum's permanent collection. Now, 25 years later, The Residents are back with The Commercial DVD, which contains over 50 new (and equally bizarre) one-minute movies. A bevy of artists and filmmakers from around the world were involved in the project, and the Residents themselves are responsible for 10 of the new videos. Those 10 (including our favorite, "Fingertips") will be screened tonight. We've seen them, and they're as brilliant, baffling and disturbing as the Residents themselves. Part of "Premieres," a 10-week series highlighting recent experimental film. Representatives of the Cryptic Corporation will be on hand to introduce the screening; Roy and Niuta Titus Theaters, 11 W. 53rd St. (5th & 6th Aves.), 212-708-9480; 8:30, $10, $6 st.
SIX DEGREES RECORD PARTY
The wait is finally over-tonight at BLVD, it's San Francisco vs. New York in a pan-global soundclash featuring Dhammal Soundsystem, a critically acclaimed Bay-area arts collective from the Asian Massive school of Midival Punditz and Karsh Kale, bringing (surprise!) DJs, live percussionists and mind-bending visual displays. Representing Brooklyn is Dub Gabriel, whose recently released Ascend expands on the global fusion dub styles of Bill Laswell and Tabla Beat Science, and Kevin Slowick, with his new film, The Center for Salvation: "a mind opening psychedelic adventure." It follows a mad scientist and his experiments deep in the Brooklyn underground. Oh, and it's free. 199 Bowery (Spring St.), 212-982-7767; 10, free.
THURSDAY DECEMBER 2
ROY HAYNES
Roy Haynes' sleek drumming makes the excellent young cats in his band look staid, which may also have been the case when he was behind Armstrong, Parker, Monk, Miles, Sarah Vaughn, Coltrane and Gillespie. The point is not that Haynes is a musical legend, it's that in person, he's a lesson in life's capacity for verve and brash brilliance: His latest recording, Fountain of Youth, hits the nail on the head. "Highlights in Jazz" also features the ace piano/guitar duo of toddlers Benny Green and Russell Malone, as well as Haynes' senior, bop vocal mainstay Bob Dorough, who'll show his bald challenger how snazzy charm plays out. Tribeca Performing Arts Center, 199 Chambers St. (betw. Greenwich St. & W. Side Hwy.), 212-220-1460; 8, $27.50, $25 st.
ARTHUR NERSESIAN
"Except for the fact that it terminates life, death is such a little-thing." "Dead skin-that's the primary ingredient of dust." "Truth of the matter is, there's only so much of anything." If you like this sort of writing, well, we can't really say anything disparaging about you. After all, you read our paper, too. On second thought, we love Arthur Nersesian. And those titles! The Fuck-Up. Chinese Takeout. Suicide Casanova. We'll see you at the reading tonight. If we get there first, we'll make sure to save you a seat. Barbès, 376 9th St. (6th Ave.), Park Slope, 718-965-9177; 7, free.
FRIDAY DECEMBER 3
SEX WORKERS BENEFIT SHOW
An event that is truly dear to New York Press' heart-or at least to the hearts of our classified advertising staff-Spread magazine is partying tonight to raise money and get this new sex workers advocacy publication up and running. Entertainment tonight includes burlesque dancers Scooter Pie, Selena Vixen, Mima Giggles, Pussycat Scratch, sex performance art, slide shows and spoken word. Not to mention the Radical Cheerleaders! RiFiFi, 332 E. 11th St. (betw. 1st & 2nd Aves.), 212-677-5368; 7, $10.
GUIDED BY VOICES
It's been a long drawn-out death, but Guided by Voices is finally throwing in the towel. No tears here-we're of the camp that considers Bee Thousand to be GBV's greatest achievement ("Twilight Campfighter" notwithstanding). Still, some respect. Tonight, it's NYC farewell number one of three, with Bob and the boys working their way through the catalog with Phantom Tollbooth in the opening slot. Tomorrow, it's Chavez (Chavez!); Sunday's openers TBA. The shows are sold out, but Craigslist can probably get you in. Irving Plaza, 17 Irving Pl. (15th St.), 212-777-6800; 8, sold out.
I LOVE YOU
First, there was the email: subject line "I love you." Then, there was the burned CD featuring a half-naked chick on the jewel case; it, too, made it clear that the sender loved us. That's when our girlfriend got suspicious. To prove our fidelity, we played for her the five-song demo by I Love You, an NYC-based duo that unapologetically evokes early Hole, Sleater-Kinney, even a bit of the PJ Harvey here and there. Tonight, they play Luna Lounge with Bigbooté and Objekt. 171 Ludlow St. (betw. Houston & Stanton Sts.), 212-260-2323; 8:30, free.
SATURDAY DECEMBER 4
LAURA ANDEL
Laura Andel's Electric Percussive Orchestra churns up Location One as part of Roulette's Concert Series. Her 10-member outfit (guitars, pianos, percussion, cornet, theremin) premieres the composer/conductor's "In::tension," improvising over inventive structures like those on '03's Red Toucan release from Andel's Somnambulist Orchestra, recorded by Elliott Sharp. 26 Greene St. (betw. Canal & Grand Sts.), 212-219-8242; 8:30, $12, $8 st.
17TH ANNUAL INDY & SMALL PRESS BOOK FAIR
You aren't going to see these books in the window while walking by Barnes & Noble. Today and Sunday, get down to the Small Press Center and browse the wares of more than 150 independent presses. Take care of some shopping and support the lifeblood of democracy at the same time. Giftwrapping is not available on location, but these books are better wrapped in newspaper anyway. 20 W. 44th St. (betw. 5th & 6th Aves.), 212-764-7021; 10-6, free.
SUNDAY DECEMBER 5
RAN
That's past tense, sucker, you dig? Spielberg, Lucas, and Francis Ford were chilling on one of their ranches one day when they decided to raise funds for their friend Akira, so that he could make the masterpiece he'd always dreamed of. The result was an adaptation of King Lear like the world had never before seen, with 1400 extras, all requiring their own armor and a castle built on the slopes of Mt. Fuji-just so they could watch it burn. Somehow, with all this, they forgot to throw in a zoom lense, so Kurosawa's epic watches sort of like a Christmas party through beer goggles. You never see anyone's face clearly, so you can't distinguish any of the feuding partiers from each other, but everyone's dressed to the nines, so you decide to stick around. Then people start kicking each other's asses and kissing each other's wives, and gramps can't handle his eggnog, so he thinks everyone's out to get him. Finally, you just zone out for an hour, only to wake up and find that those dudes who weren't invited are burning the house down, and taking all the fucking horses. American Museum of the Moving Image, 35 Ave. (36 St.), Astoria, 718-784-0077; 6:30, $10, $7.50 st./s.c.
WOMEN & ISLAM
Like peanut butter & jelly, you just can't have one without the other. Indian-born journalists Asra Nomani and Irshad Manji discuss the future with the 92nd St. Y crowd, hot on the heels of today's earlier Hannukah Family Festival at 11:30 a.m. (Women & Judaism) with origami menorah-making, dreidels, latkes and jelly donuts. 1395 Lexington Ave. (92nd St.), 212-415-5500; 7:30, $25.
A NIGHT WITH BUKOWSKI
Word is, Charles Bukowski hated Mickey Rourke's performance in Barfly. Something about the pugilist-turned-actor's grandstanding in the role of Buk's alter ego, Henry Chinaski. Shame then, that the patron saint of low-living poetry wasn't alive to catch Steve Payne's portrayal in the 29th Street Rep's presentation of South of No North back in 2000. Payne, clearly interested in exploring the man behind the Chinaski persona, drew on Bukowski's extensive body of poetry and prose and, it seemed, even live recordings. This Sunday, Buk is back-in a benefit for the non-profit 29th Street Rep. Payne will be in character, at the bar, reading and?well, probably grandstanding, but only in a way Bukowski would've approved. And we promise, not a single "To all my friends" will be uttered. Soho Playhouse, 15 Vandam St. (betw. 6th Ave. & Varick St.), 212-868-4444; 7 & 10, $25, $20 adv.
MONDAY DECEMBER 6
F. MURRAY ABRAHAM
Last we saw F. Murray Abraham, he was being lynched from Alejandro Sosa's private helicopter, his bruised face drooling lifelessly over the rolling hills of Colombia. When Antonio Montana saw his crony's grizzly fate, he proclaimed without hesitation to Sosa, "I never like him," but like any other Scarface, Amadeus or even Finding Forrester fans, we must respectfully disagree with Tony. We like F. Murray Abraham. We like him a lot. Enough to watch him read from Johann Wolfgang von Goethe's Urfaust at the Classic Stage Company? That might be a stretch. 136 E. 13th St. (betw. 3rd & 4th Aves.), 212-279-4200; 8, $30.
TUESDAY DECEMBER 7
ROB PRICE
A founder of the free-improv/rock band, Game of Death, in the early 90s, Rob Price has come a long way with his new CD, At Sunset. The record has been described as "swinging neo-roadhouse," which isn't far from the truth. In fact, his track, "Night Vision" has almost a buoyant feel to it. Without falling into pretension or the "avant garde jazz" label, his work has a sense of innocence that elevates it beyond the norm. Other tracks even have a surf feel, with an equal dose of the Trashmen and the Ventures. He defies categorization, people! That's what we're trying to say. Tonic, 107 Norfolk St. (betw. Delancey & Rivington Sts.), 212-358-7501; 10, $10.
CRASH MANSION'S PUNK/METAL KARAOKE
Despite the local media coverage, there seems to be some confusion surrounding the Arlene's Grocery Punk/Metal Karaoke. From what we understand, the band that created the event more than five years ago requested different hours and more pay, and were replaced. They grabbed their fans, declared themselves more punk rock than ever and moved over to Tuesday nights at Crash Mansion. Unfortunately, stories in the Post and Newsday have piqued the interest of more than a few yuppies, but each week their numbers dwindle and they usually leave early. Crash Mansion, 199 Bowery (Spring St.), 212-982-7767, 8-12, free.
Contributors: Simon Cohn, Jim Knipfel, Sean Manning, Dan Migdal, Tanya Richardson, Dennis Tyhacz, Alexander Zaitchik